Blizzard o' Randomness

I'm what you'd call a self-described "self-describer." I like to describe myself to others but only with the established pretense that the forthcoming self-description is just that. I feel it reduces confusion when describing oneself. That way people don't ask you questions like "is that a self-description or is that more an amalgamation of descriptions others have made of you?" I hate it when people ask me that, particularly because I never know how to spell amalgamation and thus can't look it up in a dictionary to find out what it means.

I did my first snow angel in years Saturday night. It turned out great. While doing it, I realized that the snow angel motion is pretty much the same as the jumping jack motion. If snow angels get to be called snow angels then jumping jacks should be called air angels- or maybe snow angels should just be called lying in the snow jacks. Either way, the gap must be bridged.

My friend BA (everybody should have a friend with the same name as their degree) told me he thinks I should write a joke about the bloods and the crips. He believes the rival gangs to be rich premi (shouldn't that be the plural of premise?) I don't disagree, but in the event that a member of either the bloods or the crips, or heaven forbid both, were to attend a stand-up performance of mine and did not like my joke, they might harm me. Perhaps I could avoid that potential problem by asking the audience if there are any members of the bloods or the crips in the audience prior to delivering my blood/crip joke? That would be kind of funny in and of itself. Now all I have to do is write the joke. Or perhaps that will be the entire thing. Good call BA. If nothing else by inspiring me to write about bloods and crips on my blog, you've made me quite the unlikely result for somebody's google search on gangs.

When post-its first hit the market back in 1980 I bet people were way impressed. I think it's safe to say 25 years later, the wow-factor has completely worn off. I actually hate post-its. They get all nasty and fuzzy on the once barely sticky part and they're prone to being curved and not lying flat like paper should. It's interesting though to note, pun realized not intended, that post-its were unveiled the same year I was born. I grew up in post-its golden age. I'd like to think that I've advanced much more since 1980 than the post-it has, but I suppose it's all subjective.

At a bar where I caught the tail end of a college basketball game Saturday afternoon, a guy brought his own Marquette poster to hang on the wall while he and some friends watched the Marquette game on tv. That's intense. I think I might take a page out of his book and bring a poster of James Brown out with me to bars and then put James Brown songs on the jukebox and put up the poster for the duration of the song. If you don't support your own picks nobody will.

A good way to inspire pity is to get a themed picture frame that says "best friends" or one that is in the shape of a heart, and then display it prominently, but leave it empty. Then when somebody asks you "why isn't there a picture in that frame?" you say something along the lines of "I guess people find me difficult to get close to."

I hope that today is the beginning of a wonderful week for all of us- especially you, current reader.