Stereo-Typing

This a quote from a recent Slam Magazine article on Phoenix Suns superstar Amare Stoudemire. Check it:

You ask Amare to single out his best dunk this season, and he’ll shrug and tell you, “I get four or five a game, man.” They’re like his children; he can’t separate one from the other.

They’re like his children; he can’t separate one from the other? There are several ways to interpret what the author is trying to say here, but given the NBA’s reputation for dead beat dads, I have to question his choice of metaphor, especially since it’s supposed to be positive in this context. Amare’s 22 year’s old. I’m not even certain that he has children, let alone five of them. I’m almost 100% sure that he doesn’t have quadruplets or quintuplets which would best explain the author’s comparison. If nothing else, this is a good way to promote detrimental racist stereotypes (as opposed to beneficial racist stereotypes). Why didn’t the author just write: Four to five, just like the minimum prison sentence Amare would face if ever convicted of assault while carrying a concealed weapon. Or maybe the fact that I read the metaphor this way makes me the stereotype promoting, racist one. Nah, I think I’ll blame the author.

The last time I dealt with such blatant stereotype promotion was at Michael K’s, a clothing store in SoHo, where a black salesman made the following statements to me and my friend Richie when Richie asked his opinion of a jacket.

“Of course I like that, it’s hip-hop gear. All black people love hip-hop stuff. That’s like asking me if I play basketball or if I can dance. You ever met a black dude who can’t play ball? Naw. You know what I’m saying? I mean that’s like if I met an Asian girl and she acted like she couldn’t do math. I’d be like, c’mon, that’s messed up.”

My favorite part of his rant was the hypothetical Asian girl who he meets and who “acts like she can’t do math.” I wonder how that scenario might play out. Does this guy make a habit of asking random Asian women he meets to do math for him? I wonder if he would call out this Asian actress feigning confusion at the story problem he hands her on the bus. “Nice try, Lucy Lu. Don’t shrug your shoulders, just solve the problem like we both know you can.” Richie still bought the jacket though and the guy even got commission for it. So who’s the real racist? I’ll give you a hint: my friend Richie is white.

Expect more racially charged thoughts tomorrow and from this day forth. Or more likely I’ll be back to making fun of commercials and dissecting the English language with keen insights like “Hey why don’t we get rid of the word vicariously. We only use it one context and I think everybody will understand what you mean if you simply say “I’m living through him.”

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