Lands End isn't a cool store

So my crooked pinky turns out to be the result of a torn tendon. Right now I've got what's known as a fixed deformation. That means it's so bent you couldn't even unbend it if you tried. I got some custom made splints though that hopefully will lead to the straightening of my finger and prevent me from having to get surgery. When I change from my day splint to my night splint I get to do physical therapy exercises with some putty. I think putty pretty much rules. Be it silly or Elaine's on again off again boyfriend, putty rarely disappoints. Newsprint used to ruin the silly kind though.

Some reader comments brought to my attention the fact that I haven't specified what my job is yet. I am working on an untitled pilot for Comedy Central that is going to be hosted by Greg Giraldo, who just happens to be a hilarious comedian. The show is not going to be entirely unlike Tough Crowd with Colin Quinn, but it also isn't going to be just like it. If you're reading this Colin, which I'm sure you are as is your daily custom, I just want to let you know that I had misgivings about being unfaithful to you, but daddy needed some scratch. Anyhoo I'm a writer's assistant/quasi-researcher and though things are in their nascent stages still, I'm enjoying the work. Thanks for asking.

Yet again I find myself forced to choose between trying to think of something amusing to write right now, and going home. And I ask you, what would you choose?

At what age is appropriate to start calling girls women? I'm 24 and I don't refer to any of peers as women, not that I don't recognize that they are women, just woman has a middle-aged motherly connotation as far as I'm concerned. I realize some broads take offense to being called girl but I don't know what else to call them. Males can easily be dudes or guys and that's acceptable almost regardless of their age. Females have no such equivalent. That's why I think we need to popularize calling women gals. Did I write about this before? Hmmm, that would be embarrassing. Anyway, gal(s) is the new blanket label for females of all ages. Only problem is it sounds a little bit like you're saying girl with a speech impediment or Prince Edward Islandian accent. Give it a whirl though. Man, I really think I might have written about this before but even if I didn't I've already made clear that this isn't a "new" thought. Regardless I think the message here is clear: Why haven't I left the office?

Touché self. Touché