It's cool, people will figure it out

I would love to have a chat with the genius who decided that in addition to meaning twice a month bi-weekly could alternately mean twice a week. I don’t know what it meant first, but you’d like to think whoever decided to use it for the second meaning could have predicted the potential for confusion and I don’t know, say, used a different word. The way it is now makes about as much sense as it would have had they decided to name Thursday Tuesday. Imagine that. The days of the week would be Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Tuesday, Friday, Saturday. Nobody would ever do anything on Tuesdays because it would be way too frustrating to clarify plans. “So we’re having lunch next Tuesday before Wednesday or next Tuesday after Wednesday? Why couldn’t they have come up with another name, like Larnsday? Let’s just choose a different day of the week for our bi-weekly lunch plans." (I could mean bi-weekly either way in this scenario because in it there are two Tuesdays per week. Uncharacteristically fiendish of me, I know.)

Also, good news from the “turns out I’m not going insane department.” Apparently the subtle maple syrup smell that kept wafting over me last night wasn’t leftover on my upper lip from the french toast I had for brunch last weekend. It was actually a mysterious city-wide phenomenon. Check it out. I asked several people last night at various occasions if they were picking up a syrupy scent. Most of them weren’t and consequently dismissed my question. What’s great is that for those people this New York Times headline might as well read: Hey Asshole, Adam was right.

Usually a point of contention about a matter so seemingly trivial doesn’t result in a definitive article in a major news publication. But it would be fun if that type of thing happened more often.

Then you’d see headlines like:

Bar Totally Was Where Michael’s Old Roommate Had Birthday That One Year

Even With The Two Transfers, 6 to L to F Would Be Fastest Route

Yeah, Jacksonville Already Had Their Bye Week

I’m attending a costume party tonight and have yet to nail down a solid costume idea. Right now I’m leaning towards plumber-which will consist of a tool belt, worker shirt and a preposterous amount of ass crack on display at all times. And remember kids- Stay in ghoul. May all your witches come boo and most of all remember when you cross the street to look both Skeleton-Ghost-Monster-Zombie-Devils.

Fondly, Adam