It's getting ha in here...

would be a good name for Wierd Al's next album, unless he's dead, in which case R.I.P. buddy. So I was at the Gap the other day-what can I say, I'm a label whore- and I saw a cool reversible shirt. Reversible clothes always take me on an emotional roller coaster because at first I get all excited thinking: how cool is this, it's like two shirts in one, and then I get all angry because I wonder why all my clothes aren't reversible? What a waste.

Here are five jokes I wrote last week. Imagine them being read at a desk by faux-news anchors.

Earlier this week former 98 Degrees singer Drew Lachey and dance partner Cheryl Burke won the latest installment of Dancing with the Stars, prompting executives at ABC to rename the show Dancing with the (finger quotes) “Stars.”

It was announced this week that Hilary Swank will serve as both muse and spokesperson for a new fragrance by Guerlain to be launched later this year. The fragrance will have all the characteristics of a cologne but turns out to be a perfume.

A new poll has named Psycho Path in Traverse City, Michigan and Divorce Court in Heather Highlands, Pennsylvania, as the nation's weirdest street names. In a related story determining the nation’s weirdest street names was voted as the second dumbest reason to poll people- the dumbest being: determining the dumbest reason to poll people.

Sid Smith, a 95 year-old Texas man, is running for Congress. Smith says he’s eager to represent the concerns of the elderly in Washington, so long as he doesn’t have to take one of those fancy, new-fangled flying machines to get there.

Porn star Savanna Samson is creating her own line of wines. For younger less experienced drinkers there will be ‘Barely Legal Zinfandel’ and for those craving a nice full bodied wine, look for the bottles labeled ‘I want that Pinot inside me.’

Sorry if your knees are sore from all that slapping those jokes might have inspired.

I'll leave you with this provocative question: did you guys enjoy the Oscars?